I have discovered a mystic talent that has apparently remained dormant until it suddenly stirred to life, beginning last winter: I can control the weather.
Oh no, I can't guarantee a sunny day for your wedding, or clouds for a funeral, but I have a nearly 100% rate of accuracy causing extreme snowfall. How, you ask? Merely by sitting at my laptop and sending a message to my students that there will be speech practice at a certain time on a certain day.
With that one move, I can ensure at least 2 to 5 inches of snowfall within 3 hours of the scheduled rehearsal, and I throw in an 80% possibility of bitter cold and biting winds, just to spice things up.
So far, the only way I've found to circumvent these powers is to watch weather reports and make an early decision to cancel rehearsal. If I cancel rehearsal more than 2 hours before it is to start, I can undo the effects of the original scheduling, and the weather will be sunny and clear. However, if I wait until the last minute to cancel rehearsal, the weather will be fine until rehearsal would have been over, then turn bad enough for Cedar Rapids to call off school the next day.
Behold my awesome powers! I thought I could guarantee bad weather this Thursday by scheduling a daytime rehearsal, since the kids had an inservice day scheduled. Instead, I was able to cause the school to RESCIND the INSERVICE DAY! I do not just control the weather anymore. I can actually influence an entire school board (or at least a Superintendent or two).
My New Year's resolution was to not let things beyond my control stress me out.
But I didn't think to include roadblocks created by my own unexpected mystic powers that manifest themselves in January and February. *sigh*
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